This Is Not Another Muffin Post

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Ok, I lied. Yes it is. Blame the people who follow my facebook page. I had a muffin idea in mind and asked there if they would revolt were I to post another muffin recipe and they got all excited about one more. So you can see that it’s all their fault right?? Yes… you and you and you. I’m looking your way! They forced me!!! They really did!!! I could have said no and posted sayyyyy… a liver recipe but then I would have felt horribly guilty and probably would have been turned off of cooking for weeks as I sat in bed and read cheap romance novels and ate Cheetos and Twinkies. Wait, I do that anyway. Ummm… I would have eaten ho hos as a change. Yeah, that’s the ticket. Then I would have gotten queasy and felt worse for over eating and it all would have led to it being weeks… nay, MONTHS before I posted another recipe and THEN where we would all be?! So this was the lesser evil. Honest.

So all of this is why you are getting another muffin recipe. The fate of humanity hung in the balance. Society NEEDED this recipe.

Ok, I’m gonna shut up now and post the recipe.

These were me playing around. I had been craving something mapley (yes, that too is now a word) but didn’t want pancakes. So I decided on muffins. What I ended up with was a mildly sweet muffin with the flavor of maple. I topped it with an oat, raisins (or ray-rees as my two year old calls them), pecan and maple syrup praline-ish crumble. I have to say, I was pleased with how these turned out. They aren’t too sweet which makes them a good bet for breakfast (or a snack, or dessert covered in more syrup and 32 scoops of vanilla ice cream or dinner if you’re not very hungry, or dinner if you want to eat 15 of them). So basically these muffin  are the perfect all around food. Aren’t you glad you have me here to make sure your dietary requirements are met? No no don’t thank me… just throw money. Large bills please.

This makes a lot of muffins (I got 24 regular sized ones and 4 large ones so it could be cut in half if you’re not feeding the hungry mongrel hordes)

Maple Muffins With A

Pecan & Maple Crumbly Praline Topping

  • 4 cups all purpose flour
  • 1 cup packed dark brown sugar
  • 1/2 cup pecans (can use more but I didn’t want a ton)
  • 4 teaspoons baking powder
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • 1 1/2 cups milk
  • 1 cup melted butter
  • 1 cup maple syrup (use the real stuff)
  • 1/2 cup sour cream or plain yogurt
  • 2 large eggs
  • 3 teaspoons vanilla extract
  • 2 teaspoons cinnamon
  • 1 teaspoon nutmeg
  • TOPPING-
  • 1 cup rolled oats
  • 1/2 cup maple syrup
  • 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 3/4 cup chopped pecans
  • 1/2 cup raisins
  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease or line 24 muffin cups (and four big ones or do another partial batch of small ones after the first ones are done). In a medium bowl, combine the topping ingredients and stir well. Set aside.
  2. In a large bowl, combine the flour, brown sugar,  1/2 cup pecans, baking powder, salt, cinnamon and nutmeg.
  3. In another bowl (yes, you have to dirty three bowls. I’m so sorry. But if you have kids or a husband give them clean up duty.) combine the milk, eggs, syrup, sour cream & vanilla. Mix until combined, then add the melted butter.
  4. Fill the prepared muffin cups about 2/3 full with batter. Top each with a spoonful (it actually worked better when I just used my fingers and scooped it up) of the topping you set aside.
  5. Bake in a 350 degree oven until a nice golden brown, about 20 minutes. Let cool in pan for a minute or two then put on a wire rack to finish cooling. If they don’t fit on the rack, eat them. I won’t judge.
  6. Come back here and tell me how wonderful these were. Then say something mean to deflate my ego.  Then watch me weep and feel very guilty that you caused me such pain.

 

 

Muffin Overload Part Drei (Cause I don’t know how to spell three in French)

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But I’m letting you know here and now. I kinda like citrus flavors. I know; shocking huh? You never would have figured that out if I hadn’t offered the info, would you? I hide it so well. Did you know about the Twinkie and Cheeto addiction? Ok, I’m pushing it now huh?

I seriously do have a thing for citrus though. Especially Lemon. No wait… limes. But then again the orange family is kinda cool. Ooo, ooo, oooo, I forgot grapefruit. Sigh. I can’t choose. This is why you all get subjected to so many citrus recipes. Somehow I doubt too many people mind though. I have noticed that after chocolate (before in some cases but I figure they need massive therapy) citrus recipes, especially lemon seem to be among the most popular. Be it sweet or savory, they seem to rule the foodie roost. Why do I suddenly have a mental image of a big lemon chicken crowing?

I wanted to make something lemony for the last part of the muffin overload series. But plain old boring lemon muffins are…well… boring. Not that these have had any drastic changes made to them. I just played enough with a basic muffin recipe to give them some oomph (add that one to the list of  “where the heck did that word come from” words. I mean… seriously? Oomph?) I added a dollop of lemon curd to the center and used Greek yogurt to the batter for richness, moisture and even a modicum of nutrition (scary huh?) Then I coated then with a very sunnyish (yes, that is now a word. Love me, love my quirks 😛 ) honey lemon glaze (there’s that honey lemon thing peeking it’s head up again huh? What can I say? I enjoy the combo.) If you don’t want the lemon honey glaze you could go with a lemon and powdered sugar glaze or just leave them naked. But if you do, they will be very embarrassed. Lemon muffins are timid creatures. Did I mention that love me, love my quirks thing? Just checking. But try these timid muffins. The muffin is a sweet lemony flavor with a tiny bit of tang yet the curd and the glaze add a yummy lemony tartness. This can be cut in half if 24 muffins is too much for you.

Triple Lemon Muffins

  • 1 cup unsalted butter, softened
  • 1 1/2 cups sugar
  • 4 large eggs
  • 2 2/3 cups all purpose flour
  • 2 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • zest of two large lemons
  • 1/2 cup lemon juice
  • 1 cup plain Greek yogurt
  • 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons lemon extract
  • 2 teaspoons almond extract (yes, almond extract. It adds an indefinable something to so many fruit recipes. Trust me.)
  • 1 jar store bought lemon curd (the home made version is too soft to work well)
  • 4 tablespoons lemon juice
  • 4 tablespoons honey
  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line 24 muffin cups with paper or foil liners.
  2. In a large bowl, cream together the butter and sugar. Add the eggs, extracts and lemon juice. Beat in the yogurt.
  3. In another bowl, mix the flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt and lemon zest.
  4. Make a well in the center of the dry ingredients and pour in the wet mixture all at once, Stir until just combined.
  5.  Spoon batter into lined muffin cups, filling about 2/3 full. Add a small spoonful of the lemon curd to the top of each cup of muffin batter.
  6. Bake at 350 for about 20 minutes or until a light golden brown. Remove from pan and let sit on a wire rack.
  7. Mix the honey and remaining lemon juice. Drizzle or spoon glaze over the tops of the warm muffins. Let finish cooling on the rack. Store in your belly. 😀

Muffin Overload Part Deux

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Like I said, funky looking. 😀

I just had to write that as part Deux instead of part two. I was typing and suddenly channeled the movie “Hot Shots- Part Deux”. Truthfully, one of the stupidest movies ever made (it DID star Charlie Sheen after all even if it was before he had tiger blood…or was it a jaguar…or maybe just a baboon). But I admit that stupid as it was, it made me laugh in a few parts. The frightened laughter of one who is quickly going insane, but laughter nonetheless.

Part Two…erhmmm, Deux is a Double Cheese/Bacon Muffin. These are lumpy and funny looking and deformed and they taste fantastic. Why do they look funny you ask? Because they are quite possibly more cheese and bacon than they are muffin batter. This isn’t a bad thing. Think about it; do you eat a muffin for that tasty batter or do you eat it for what is IN that tasty batter? Yeah; that’s what I thought. me too. So I made a muffin that was more tasty things than tasty batter. Be ready though; Like I said… these aren’t pretty. But they taste yummy enough that you won’t care. Slather them with butter… trust me on that. Butter…cheese…bacon… need I say more? 😀

Double Cheese And Bacon Muffins

 

  • 2 cups all purpose flour
  • 2 teaspoons baking powder
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons salt
  • 12 ounces bacon, cooked crispy and crumbled
  • 8 ounces shredded cheddar cheese
  • 8 ounces shredded Swiss cheese
  • 5 green onions, sliced thin
  • 1 to 2 tablespoons of your favorite hot sauce (I use Franks Red Hot Sauce- best hot sauce ever)
  • 1 egg, beaten (bad egg, bad egg! Sorry… couldn’t resist)
  • 1 cup milk
  • 4 tablespoons oil
  • 2 tablespoons bacon drippings (you heard me… use it gosh darn it 😛 )
  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees and grease 12 muffin cups. Do NOT use liners; this will stick and it will be like trying to peel a piece of hot bubble gum off of paper if you do)
  2. Mix together the flour, baking powder, salt, green onions and cheeses. Stir well to combine.
  3. In another bowl, mix the egg, milk,  oil, hot sauce and bacon drippings. Stir well.
  4. Make a well in the center of the dry ingredients and pour in the wet mixture. Just barely combine them. Fold in the bacon JUST until mixed.
  5. Spoon into the greased muffin cups and bake at 350 until golden brown, about 20 minutes.
  6. Slather with a ton of butter and eat. Then eat another. Then decide, as my son in law did, that while you weren’t sure at the first bite, that these are now your favorite muffin ever.

Muffin Overload Part One

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Ignore that mine are funny shaped. I am the poster child for overfilling muffin cups lol

My much loved husband has left until tomorrow. He is going to pick up his kids so that they can come here to visit for a couple of weeks. So in what I know is a totally misguided effort on my part, one that is doomed to failure because..well, I am going to be surrounded by 4 teenagers, one almost teen, a toddler and a grown man not known for neatness, I am trying to make some baked goods to wrap and store.

My hope is that 1) I won’t be constantly deluged with ardent cries of “Janet/momma/hon, I’m hungry… when’s dinner…dessert…breakfast…lunch…my 47th snack of the day”  if there are fairly healthy wholesome snackies around and 2) that maybe, just maybe, this can be a bit of a vacation for me too as opposed to my having to follow a bunch of almost grown up, one grown up and a little one around saying “Can you please pick that up/put that away/stop painting the cat pink/quit tying up your step brother/sister with duct tape” and variations on that theme. I know… I’m naive. I always have had a rather unhealthy preoccupation with rose colored glasses. 😛

But I am giving it the old college effort (yet another saying that when I contemplate it, I wonder where it came from. Isn’t a “college effort” something consisting of seeing how many beers you can chug in two minutes without throwing up? ). I made a few different kinds of muffins and am working on cookies.  I’m going to share the muffin recipes in a three part post series. Why? Because that way I don’t have to write one post the size of War And Peace 😀 So here is the first. Blueberry Cheesecake Muffins. Enjoy. Slather with butter or jam or honey or…or…liverwurst if that’s your muffin thing. 😛 This makes 26 to 30 muffins (remember, I’m cooking for the hungry mongrel hordes) but it should be easily halved. Or doubled. Or quadrupled…or Eightrupled (yes, I know that’s not a word but I liked the way it sounded). They are tender & moist with a yummy blueberry almondish flavor and a slight tang from the cream cheese.

Blueberry Cheesecake Muffins

  • 4 cups all purpose flour
  • 1 3/4 cups sugar
  • 1 tablespoon baking powder
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • 8 ounces cream cheese, softened
  • 2 1/2 tablespoons lemon juice
  • 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
  • 4 teaspoons almond extract
  • 4 large eggs
  • 1/2 cup melted butter (unsalted please)
  • 1 cup milk
  • 1/2 cup plain Greek yogurt
  • 2 1/2 cups fresh blueberries (could use frozen I would assume in the off season; just use them still frozen, not thawed)
  1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Grease 30 muffin cups or  line with paper or foil liners.
  2. In a large bowl, mix together the flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda and salt. Stir well and set aside for now.
  3. In another large bowl,beat the cream cheese until smooth. Add the eggs, lemon juice, vanilla extract and almond extract. Beat well.
  4. Add in the melted butter. Beat well. Add the milk and yogurt. yep; you guessed it. Beat well 😛
  5. Gently fold in the blueberries. Fill muffin cups 3/4 fill (do not do what I did and overfill them. Oops? and bake at 350 for about 30 minutes or until a nice golden brown. Cool on a wire rack for 15 minutes. Eat. Do that liverwurst thing. Just don’t tell me about it.

When Life Gives You Lemons…

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…make cheesecake. Yep; cheesecake. I’m not a huge lemonade fan so I made cheesecake with my lemons. When I want lemonade I grab the container of country time and pour out some highly processed sugar and real lemon flavor.  What the heck IS that anyway? I mean, it’s either real lemon or it’s lemon flavor. How can you have real lemon flavor? Wouldn’t that make it real lemon? Or fake flavor? I’m so confused! Yet… I drink it. Go figure. Speaking of which, have any of you ever tried it hot? It’s quite yummy that way. I’m sure it would work fine with that *gasp* real lemonade stuff too. 😛 As for me, I’ll save my “Whoa; have these gotten expensive or WHAT?!” lemons for cooking with and keep chugging the fake stuff… hot or cold. 😀

Moving on (I really can’t type that anymore without giggling), I love lemon, I love cheesecake, I love honey. I also love Bath and Body Works Lemon Vanilla Body Spray (which those meanie heads discontinued. I still haven’t forgiven them for that even if I DID buy enough to make a small country of people with bad B.O. smell yummy) and it was the inspiration for this recipe. When I wear it, I smell like a sexy lemon cupcake. But I didn’t want cupcakes. I have done the lemon cupcake thing in here recently. Not that that will stop me from making variations here in the future but still…

So I made cheesecake. But not just your typical lemon cheesecake. I love the combo of lemon and honey (I will also be doing a home made lemon honey marmalade soon) and decided to try it in cheesecake. But I also wanted to find a way to use up some blueberries that were shouting from the fridge that they were getting old and some apricots that were doing the same thing on the counter. So I made a blueberry/apricot compote to go with this as well as some candied lemon slices.  Can we say “Oh.My.God.?” *wait for all of you to say oh my God”. You done now? Ok. This cheesecake is fantastic. It’s bright and sunny and refreshing with a nice lemon tang and a subtle hit of honey flavor. The compote spooned over it just adds this final fruity pizzazz and the candied lemon slices are sweet and tart and chewy and I wanted to hug them. But they’re sticky so I didn’t. I have long hair; no lemon slices stuck in hair please. So try this; I am pretty sure you won’t be disappointed. Unless you don’t like lemon or honey in which case why the heck would you make it anyway? 😀

Decadent Lemon Honey Cheesecake

With A

Blueberry/Apricot Compote And

Candied Lemon Slices

  • Candied lemon Slices (optional)-
  • 2 large lemons, sliced about 1/4 inch thick (a mandolin set on thick slice works great)
  • 2 cups water plus more for initial cooking
  • 1 1/2 cups sugar plus more for coating slices
  • Cheesecake-
  • 2 cups vanilla wafer crumbs
  • 5 tablespoons melted butter
  • 2 teaspoons sugar
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 24 ounces cream cheese, softened
  • 1/4 cup all purpose flour
  • 3 large eggs
  • 1 1/2 cups honey
  • 1/2 cup sugar
  • 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
  • 1 teaspoon lemon extract
  • zest from 2 large lemons
  • 1/3 cup fresh lemon juice (if the 2 lemons don’t have that much, feel free to round it out with bottled)
  • 1/2 cup sour cream
  • Cheesecake Topping-
  • 1 cup sour cream
  • 1/3 cup sugar
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla
  • Blueberry Apricot Compote-
  • 1 pint fresh blueberries
  • 6 apricots, quartered
  • 1/3 cup sugar
  • 1 teaspoon lime zest
  • 2 tablespoons lime juice
  1. For candied lemons-Add lemon slices to a large pot. Cover with water. Bring to a boil and let boil for about five minutes. Drain and rinse well. Do this procedure one more time. This helps leech out the bitterness of the peel.
  2. After the second time, put peels back in the pot with the 2 cups water and 1 1/2 cups sugar. Stir to combine. Cook over low heat, stirring occasionally, until lemon slices are tender and translucent, about 90 minutes. Lay lemons slices in a single layer on a wire rack. Let them dry for 24 hours (this is why I say the lemon slices are optional. Up to you whether or not you want to commit to this amount of time for the full cheesecake idea). They will still be tacky. Drop them into a bowl or baggie) of sugar and toss to coat. Set aside.  Also, don’t throw out the syrup left in the pot from the lemons. Pour it into a bowl or a canning jar and put it into the fridge. Due to the naturally high amounts of pectin, after a couple of hours, it will set up into a yummy sort of a lemon jelly which is great on toast or mixed with other ingredients to make a glaze for roast or grilled chicken.
  3. For cheesecake-Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Lightly spray 9 inch spring form pan with cooking spray. Wrap pan well in heavy duty foil.
  4. Mix together the cookie crumbs, melted butter, 2 teaspoons sugar and 1 teaspoon vanilla extract in large bowl or food processor. Press mixture on to bottom and 1 inch up sides of prepared pan. Cook at 350 for five minutes. take out and set aside. Lower oven heat to 325.
  5. In a large bowl, beat cream cheese with flour until smooth. Don’t over beat. Over beating is one of the main reasons cheesecakes crack. It adds to much air to them.
  6. Add the eggs, honey, sugar,  extracts, lemon zest and juice. On low speed, beat until smooth and creamy. Gently fold in the sour cream. Bang the bowl (carefully lol) a few times on the counter to help release some of the air bubbles.
  7. Put pan in a large high sided baking pan. Pour cheesecake batter into pan. Put the pan into the oven and carefully pour two cups of water around the pan. Bake at 325 until center is just barely set but still has a touch of jiggle to it. It will finish setting as it cools. When done, set spring-form pan on a wire rack and leave for 30 minutes then refrigerate for at least 4 hours. at least four hours to cool.
  8. When it has cooled, carefully loosen and remove the side of the spring-form pan. Scrape off all the goop that stuck to the sides and eat it. 😀
  9. For compote- while cheesecake is cooking- in a medium sauce pot, combine all the compote ingredients. Stir well to coat apricots with lime juice to prevent discoloring (you can see in my photo that not all of mine got coated well. Learn from me grasshopper! )  Over low heat, cook, stirring constantly, just until sugar is dissolved. Spoon into a bowl; cover and refrigerate.
  10. Mix topping ingredients and spoon onto the top of the cheesecake. Smooth to make it look purty. 😛
  11. To serve- put slices of cheesecake onto serving dishes and spoon a little of the compote over or around it. Add a candied lemon slice to the top and eat. 🙂

Drunk Fruits (*Hicccc…cuppppp*)

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I was playing with the editing setting and liked the glowing look here. It fits for drunk fruit 😀

I like drunk fruits. I like the way they giggle and the way they look at their hands like they have just discovered the most amazing thing since sliced bread (especially since it would be hard to slice said bread w/out the hands). I like the way their cheeks get all red and glowy looking when they have become drunk fruit. I like the way they lose all inhibitions and start talking a mile a minute and are no longer timid and shy.

Wait. Fruits don’t have hands do they? And they can’t slice bread. Nor do they giggle and I’m pretty sure that they have no inhibitions to lose. Sigh. I think…maybe…possibly that what I was describing is what happens when I get a hold of fruits that have been made drunk, i.e., shoved into a bottle of alcohol and left to get pickled… sloshed, tipsy…. totally and completely wasted.

But wouldn’t it be awesome  if fruit could do all of those things?! It would probably be far more entertaining to watch a giggling talkative Apricot than it is when I am the one talking a mile a minute with red cheeks and looking at my hands like they are doing things that a disco ball can only dream of.

So in honor of drunk fruits…or a tipsy me; pick whichever makes you giggle more, I am sharing a recipe for a drunken Apricot. Many many of them as a matter of fact. And these little boogers appreciate it because they start out all dried and shriveled and end up looking like Meg Ryan after more collagen injections (can anyone please explain to me why she did that btw? ICK! She was cute before but now my apricots look better!).

I originally got this recipe off of food.com but have changed it quite a bit over the years. The bottle I have right now (it’s not the first I’ve made) is now over 2 years old and as smooth as a babies bottom. Ok, maybe equating the booze I’m trying to get you to drink with a baby tush isn’t the greatest analogy but you know what I mean 😀 Give this a try. the longer it sits, the smoother it gets. Just don’t be fooled; this packs a punch. The sweet mild taste can be deceiving. Believe me… I know. 😛

Apricot Liqueur

  • 4 cups decent quality vodka
  • 1 cup sugar
  • rind from one small lemon
  • 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
  • 16 ounces dried apricots
  1. Mix the sugar with 1/4 cup hot water to dissolve it somewhat.
  2. In a large scrupulously clean bottle (I have used bottles I have found at yard sales, a large glass crock and what actually worked best was an empty gallon wine glass wine jug.), mix together all of your ingredients. Shake well and then cap or put lid on if using a crock.
  3. Store in a dark cool place for at least one week. Remember, the flavor will get more intense and the alcohol bite smoother the longer it sits so if you’d like to make this as say, gifts for Christmas, I’d say to start now to give it time to pick up flavors.
  4. You can strain this through cheesecloth if the little tiny bits of fruit in it annoy you aesthetically but to be honest, I’ve never bothered. There isn’t actual fruit in it and there is not even to notice. You can only see it in bright light like what these photos were taken in.
  5. Serve in SMALL glasses (lol) or use in baking. It goes wonderfully in an apricot pound cake.

The Humble Potato Isn’t Always So Humble

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Sometimes it can be anything but humble and anything but just the boring spud.
Normally, on holidays like the 4th of July, I make the typical American standby of potato salad made with mayo, pickle relish and other things. I love it and I will post the recipe for my version at some point this Summer but today I just felt like doing something different. I thought of loaded baked potato salad and then decided not to. I thought of plain mashed potatoes and then thought that to me, they are meant to be a Thanksgiving or Christmas tater side dish. Potato pancakes… nope, need a pork roast and sauerkraut. Can’t make much in the way of dessert from them and they don’t magically turn into Cheetos or Twinkies; mores the pity :-D.

So I played. At first bite, this was so different than what I usually make and I am such a creature of routine and such a traditionalist that I was disappointed. Until I took another bite. And another. And then I needed to stop because otherwise there was going to be nothing left to feed my husband and kids. And while I knew I could open boxed mac and cheese and they’d be ecstatic, I couldn’t bring myself to do that. So I shared. Cause I’m cool like that. I feed my family 😛 Sometimes anyway.

Truthfully though, this turned out quite good. The mix of the potatoes, dressing, tomatoes and onions was yummy. I had planned this to be a warm salad but my husband, who has to have his food hot enough to blister his tongue, said it was even better hot and I thought it was good both warm and cold. So take your pick. It works at all temps 🙂 This is supremely simple yet so good for the lack of time and effort you put into it.

Honey Dijon Roasted Potato Salad

  • 2 to 2 1/2 pounds Idaho Russet potatoes (about 7 medium potatoes), cubed into bite sized pieces
  • 1/4 cup vegetable or canola oil
  • 1 teaspoon onion powder
  • 1 teaspoon garlic powder
  • 2 large tomatoes, seeded and cut into bite sized chunks
  • 3 green onions, thinly sliced
  • 1/2 to 2/3 cup Honey Dijon vinaigrette depending on how saucy you like your potatoes. I used half a cup and that was fine. (you can use home made or store bought dressing. Just use your favorite. I used Kraft but I am also going to try making  it with home made)
  1. Preheat your oven to 375 degrees. Line a large baking sheet with foil. I used the non stick foil because beyond the no sticking which roasted potatoes seem to like to do, I have found that potatoes brown better when you use this foil as opposed to regular foil.
  2. In a large bowl, combine the potatoes, onion powder, garlic powder and oil. Toss well to coat.
  3. Scoop out onto the baking sheet and level them as close as possible into one layer.
  4. Bake at 375 until they are tender and nicely browning, making sure to turn them once or twice so all sides can get browned well. This took about 45 minutes for me.
  5. Combine the potatoes, tomatoes and dressing in a large bowl. Again; toss well to coat. Pour into a serving dish and EAT! Like I said above, this can be served at room temp, heated up or from the fridge. It was liked all ways.


My First Guest Post

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Hey everybody who insanely follows my blog because you obviously need massive therapy and I have a drug emanating from the page that assimilates you without your knowledge !!

Go check out my guest post over at the blog “Dinners, Dishes And Desserts”, usually hosted by the lovely Erin . She’s on vacation right now and asked me to do a post for her but I’m not going to tell you what it is; you have to go over there and look. Nanananananaaaaaaaaa!!! Her blog is wonderful anyway so go check. Go! Shoo! Nothing to see here! Move along!

Go Here To See It

You Can So Eat Chili In The Summer!!!

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Cause I said so! So there!!! Pffffttttt.

Mind you, I am sitting here eating Jays Brand Cheese Wheels.

Because as  yummy as my white chicken chili is, I have a reputation as a poor eater to keep going here. That takes a lot of work! You have no idea how I sacrifice for all of you just so that I can be the one sane port in your busy lives, the one place you can go to where the personality behind the words stays the same. I eat Twinkies (and Ho-Hos) Cheetos (and Tostitos with home made Peach salsa that I magically suck any nutrition out of before eating it). I chow down on chocolate by the pound and sigh heavily in martyred frustration as I do so. I also drink pop and strong caffeinated beverages. And I do this for YOU gentle reader… YOU. Can you FEEL the sacrificial vibes coming to you? Can you… wait, scuse me; gotta wipe the orange goop off the keyboard. Ok, I’m back. Where was I? Oh yeah; vibes. Yeah yeah yeah, vibes, sacrifice, Twinkies, noble kind soul that you adore… well, maybe I didn’t say that last part but I know you were thinking it so I went ahead and inserted it in there. 😛

If, by the way, you have never had Jays Products… I’m sorry. You can get some of them online but alas, not the cheese waffles. This is actually the first time I’VE had them in many years and why a Kroger store in Kentucky was suddenly stocking them, I don’t know. But I bought a bag anyway and am currently gorging on them like a six year old given a bag of chocolate covered sugar bombs (Oh Calvin you are my hero) and a spoon. Jays is a Chicago based company that seriously makes the best potato chips ever and I’m not just saying that because I am a native Chicagoan. Snyders Of Hanover has bought them now so I have no idea if the products have changed at all but I know the cheese waffles are still yummy.  Their sour cream and onion potato chips are stupendous and I even love their BBQ chips and I don’t even like BBQ chips. Hmmm, thinking of it, the fact that Snyders bought them may very well BE why I am seeing them here. Oh also, if you’ve ever had and loved Krunchers potato chips, they are made by Jays.  They also make the most awesomeest  cheese popcorn too. If you see Oko-E-Doke popcorn, grab them all! If by some strange chance you don’t like them, sell them for millions to people living outside their native area. It’s like popcorn crack. Better yet, just mail them all to me.

Oh well, for those of you who aren’t currently experiencing the chance to have a sore tongue (boy that sounds wrong) from eating too many rough textured and overly salty cheese wheels, I made White Chicken Chili for today’s post. And no it is NOT too hot for chili. Just crank up the A/C and start shivering. Then have some nice hot chili and a cup of tea. You’ll thank me. Just don’t forget to turn the A/C back down before bed so you don’t freeze to the sheets during the night when you drool on the pillow. Oh don’t lie! You do SO drool on the pillows!

This chili uses…GASP… a convenience product or two. I did NOT grow. dry and then soak my own beans. That’s why they make canned beans (though I DO soak my own when I make red beans and rice). Also, this uses a package of McCormicks White Chili Seasoning along with the other things you’ll put in it. It cracks me up when people get upset over packaged mixes like these. Hello?! Did you grow that bottle of Chipotle peppers yourself? The Cumin? The Chile Peppers? All the beans? If so, awesome, more power to you and may I please know what type of speed you use to get through a normal day? If not, then shush darn it, shush. Just make the chili. The mix is simply a pre-blended mix of spices one would use ANYWAY. And this is a particularly wonderful version of chili. it’s creamy and tangy and spicy and *wipes non cheese wheel caused drool* filled with chunks of chicken. It makes a big batch so feel free to cut it in half.

Creamy White Chicken Chili

  • 2 pounds boneless skinless chicken breasts, cut into bite sized cubes (I have also used a mix of breasts and boneless skinless thighs to good reviews)
  • 1 pound of either andouille sausage, sliced thin or 1 pound Cajun flavored smoked sausage ( I have used both at various times. Either ones is tasty.)
  • 2 medium onions (about 2 to 2 1/2 cups), chopped
  • 2 cloves minced garlic
  • 1 tablespoon oil
  • 4 cans great northern beans, drained well
  • 3 cans chicken broth
  • 2 teaspoons oregano
  • 1 teaspoon cumin
  • 1 teaspoon ground chipotle pepper (optional)
  • 1 package McCormick White Chicken Chili mix
  • 3 4 ounce cans chopped mild green chilies
  • 1 cup heavy cream (you can sub fat free half and half if you absolutely MUST 😛 )
  • 1 cup sour cream (same with the sour cream; you can sub fat free and if you DO make these changes, it decreases the fat and calories substantially since the rest of the chili is quite good for you)
  • green onions, cheese and whatever else you usually garnish/serve chili with 😀
  1. In a large heavy bottomed sauce pot, saute the chicken, onions and garlic in the oil until the chicken is no longer pink. Add the rest of the ingredients EXCEPT for the sour cream and heavy cream.
  2. Bring to a boil, then lower heat to a simmer. Cook uncovered for 1 hour stirring frequently to prevent sticking. Remove from heat and stir in the sour cream and heavy cream. This is a thin soup like chili so don’t expect a thick one. If you want thicker, use one less can chicken broth. But if so, make sure you watch it carefully as it cooks so the liquid doesn’t cook down too much.
  3. Ladle into bowls and garnish with sliced green onions and Colby Jack cheese.

Let Them Eat Cake

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As you can see, I stink at decorating 😛

 

But if you let them eat cake, make sure you refrigerate it after frosting it. Why you ask? Oh, just go look at the picture at the bottom of the post and you’ll understand hehe. This is what happens to a butter based frosting when left in a warm kitchen for too long. All I could think of was “omg, I am SO glad I got the photos taken!” My husband has more than once paid me the supreme compliment of calling me the most laid back person he’s ever known but I’m not sure how laid back I’d have been if the only photos I had to show you were the last ones lol. Though I did die laughing when my son called me (my husband and I were out) to tell me the cake had “collapsed”. I figure it still tastes good and I’m sure not out to prove to all of you how perfect I am so I want you to enjoy the laugh too.

So do as I say not as I did in this case. REFRIGERATE THE CAKE!!!! And maybe don’t put quite as much frosting in between the layers as I did. 😀 Just eat it from a spoon because you are going to have extra frosting because I am feeling too lazy to refigure the math to cut down the amounts so that you don’t have too much frosting between your layers. Just give the kids a spoon or offer the neighbor some frosting. They won’t refuse; I promise 😀

Ok; moving on (hehe… I think those words are becoming my trademark. I can’t write them now without giggling. I’m not going to tell you that this is a quick fix cake or something to start when you need a quick dessert. But for a special occasion or just cause you want to treat your family, this is an excellent choice. It’s showy (especially if you are better at decorating than I am which isn’t difficult because I’m horrible at it), rich and moist and tastes great. But it DOES take time. You could use a box mix for the cake I would guess and it would work but I make no promises as to whether it would be as good.  The cake recipe comes from Food Network and the frosting is from me.

Chocolate Fudge cake

With

Chocolate Raspberry Butter Cream Frosting

  • CAKE-
  • 3 cups brown sugar
  • 3/4 cup canola oil
  • 3 eggs (bring to room temp)
  • 2 2/3 cups all purpose flour
  • 2 1/4 teaspoons baking powder
  • 2 1/4 teaspoons baking soda
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons salt
  • 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
  • 1 1/2 cups milk
  • 1 1/8 cups cocoa powder (unsweetened)
  • 1/3 cup seedless raspberry jam, melted (you will be using this after the cake layers have cooled and this is my own addition so feel free to omit if you want)
  • FROSTING-
  • 1/2 cup pureed and strained raspberries (2 pints got me the half cup and some extra raspberries for decorating)
  • 1/3 cup seedless raspberry jam
  • 3 sticks unsalted butter, softened
  • 3 cups semi sweet or bittersweet chocolate, chopped
  • 3 to 5 cups powdered sugar (will vary)
  • 1/3 cup heavy cream
  • 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 1 teaspoon raspberry extract (optional; I didn’t think it needed it but wanted to post it for those who might like it)
  1. Cake- Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease and flour three nine inch cakes pans (I used Bakers Joy instead; the spray that has both oil and flour in it and it worked fine)
  2. In a large bowl, combine the brown sugar and oil. On low speed of your mixer, add the eggs. Set aside and mix together your flour, salt, baking powder and baking soda.
  3. In a measuring cup, mix your vanilla into your milk (yes; this recipe makes a lot of dirty dishes 😛 ) and set aside.
  4. Bring the water to a boil and pour over the cocoa and whisk until it is well blended and smooth.
  5. To the egg mixture, alternately add the flour mixture and the milk mixture, beginning and ending with the flour. Make sure to scrape the sides of the bowl off after each addition.
  6. At low speed, add in the cocoa mixture.
  7. Pour into the prepared cake pans and bake at 350 until a toothpick inserted in center comes out clean, about 20 to 25 minutes. When cake layers have cooled, remove from pan and refrigerate the layers while you make the frosting. If you have no room to put in the fridge, just cover and set somewhere cool.
  8. FROSTING-
  9. While cake layers cool, make your frosting. Melt the chocolate with the heavy cream in the microwave until chocolate is melted (about 1 1/2 minutes). Stir until smooth. Set in the fridge to cool down somewhat, about ten minutes. Don’t leave too long or it will harden back up.
  10. Beat the butter, raspberries, raspberry jam and vanilla extract until well blended. Beat in the chocolate mixture.  One cup at a time, beat in the powdered sugar, stopping at four cups.
  11. Refrigerate frosting mixture for one to two hours.
  12. When thoroughly cold, beat mixture at high speed until thick and fluffy. If not thick enough to be spreadable, add more powdered sugar, one cup at a time, beating well after each addition.
  13. Take melted jam and using a pastry brush, brush generously over two of the cake layers.
  14. Set one cake layer (one of the ones with with jam) on serving plate and frost generously (but…ummm… not too generously like I did lol). Carefully top with the other jammed layer and frost. Top that with the last layer and frost top and sides. The cake can now legally use the name “Mount Cakesuvius”. Decorate as desired.

 

Mount Cakesuvius after it exploded