Say Cheese!!! C’mon Say It!

Posted on by
28

This Is Cheese

 

Ok, go listen to that video (it won’t be easy but you can do it. I have faith in you) then come back here.

Admit it, as stupid as that video was, it made you smile and maybe even laugh just because it IS so darn stupid.

Here’s another if you’re feeling masochistic

I like cheese. Did I ever tell you that? Ok, let me rephrase so that you’ll stop rolling your eyes at me…AGAIN. Didn’t your mother ever tell you that your face would freeze that way btw? It’s not very polite either so stop it right now or no cheese. Rephrasing now. No, I did NOT get distracted again. It was YOUR fault this time! Was so! I see you there shaking your head and…ewwww… stop doing that!

Assssss I was saying before you so rudely interrupted me with your eye rolling and that other thing I hope never to see you do again, I like cheese. A lot. Cheese makes me happy. Ok, so I’m also the woman made happy by Twinkies and Cheetos.  I’m easily pleased! This is a good thing. My husband doesn’t have to buy me diamonds. Just a wedge of Brie now and then or toss some sharp Cheddar my way when my mouth is open. Which isn’t as often as one would think actually. In real life, he’s lucky to get ten words a day out of me and I’m painfully shy. Stop laughing! It’s true! It’s only when writing that I’m a total idiot lunatic.

I also like bacon. Almost as much as I like cheese. On days when I’m feeling the need for salt and/or porky goodness, I may like it better. When I can find a way to mix the two, I’m in hog heaven. Or would that be cheese heaven? Oh my, now I’m confused. Ah HA! Hog heaven that is made out of cheese!! Yes, yes I am in a weird mood today. Why do you ask? I thought I was being rather mild…well for me anyway. We all know it gets worse at times.

I think it may be best for all of us if I just get to todays recipe. Whadda ya mean you agree!? I thought you came here for my fun loving ways!? Heh. That one even made ME laugh. Moving on now.

I love loaded baked potatoes, loaded mashed potatoes, loaded potato CHIPS. Fine, I love anything that is called loaded because someone thought to add cheese and bacon to it; preferably with a side of sour cream. I wanted that recently but wasn’t in a potato mood. So I played around and made loaded mac and cheese. Can we say yummy?! (admit it, you just yelled “yummy” in your head. It’s a Pavlovian sort of a reaction we humans have 😛 ) it really is good. Cheese, bacon, cheese, sour cream, bacon, cheese. Oh yeah some green onions and maybe some pasta too. Try it; you’ll like it. This makes a lot so feel free to cut it in half. But if you make it all then let it cool, you can cut it into individual servings then wrap them and freeze them. Also, this isn’t fancy. There is no making a white sauce, adding your cheese, praying that it doesn’t burn or stick. This is a basic throw together mac and cheese but very yummy and tastes good enough for company. I’ll post “fancier” more complex ones at other times. If you’re wanting fancy, go try this one; you’ll love it! French Onion Soup Mac & Cheese

Loaded Macaroni & Cheese

  • 1 lb of your favorite pasta shape (I used shells)
  • 1 lb bacon, cooked then crumbled (reserve about 1 tablespoon of drippings to add to the mac and cheese)
  • 3 large green onions, sliced
  • 1/2 cup sour cream
  • 1 1/2 cups milk (maybe more if needed to get consistency you prefer)
  • 1/2 cup (one stick) butter
  • 1 teaspoon favorite hot sauce (optional but it adds a bit of tang)
  • 1 teaspoon mustard (again optional but it helps cut the richness)
  • 1 8 ounce container chive cream cheese
  • 1 lb sharp cheddar, shredded
  • 8 ounces monterey jack cheese, shredded
  • 1/4 cup Parmesan cheese, grated
  • whatever sort of cheese you prefer to top the pan and showcase all the cheesy yumminess (I used Provolone)
  1. Butter a 13×9 pan, preferably a glass one as metal can add off tastes. If using metal, at least line it with foil. 🙂
  2. Heat oven to 350 degrees.
  3. In a large pot, cook pasta according to package directions. Drain well, then add back to the pot. Add in the milk, butter, hot sauce, mustard and cream cheese. Over low heat, heat until cream cheese is melted, stirring constantly to prevent sticking. Add in the rest of the cheeses and the bacon and reserved bacon drippings (honest; it adds flavor and at this point, worrying about the calories is pretty silly 😛 ) and stir constantly until cheese is melted. If too thick for you, add more milk about 1/4 cup at a time.
  4. Pour into buttered pan. Top with a few slices of cheese. Wow; more cheese. Imagine that. Even if you’re not lactose intolerant you may want to take a box or two of Lactaid before you eat this. Hehe. Bake at 350 JUST long enough to melt and maybe lightly brown the cheese on top. If you cook too long, it will dry out. It is already cooked; this is just for melting purposes.
  5. Serve. Eat. Moan. The End. 😀


    I Always Loved Count Chocula

    Posted on by
    38

    Yes, that is a used jar with an old label there. I was too lazy to peel it all off. 😀

     

    Though thinking about it and posting in all honesty, I’m not sure why I used past tense in that title; I STILL love Count Chocula the best. He’s my man. Don’t even try telling me he isn’t real and the relationship can never work. It’s fate that we stay together even when I am 96 years old and gumming oatmeal for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I’ll just have to let the yummy chocolatey goodness sit in the milk a little longer is all. I’m also a sad portrait of a Cap’n Crunch addict but don’t tell the Count; he’s a jealous sort.

    What are your favorite cereals. If you say you are madly in love with say, Shredded Wheat in soy milk I am going to worry about you. Same if you answer Grape Nuts. I mean c’mon, we’re all friends here… let’s quit trying to be all adult and pretend we really eat that crap for any other reason that it’s good for us and we know we need to take care of ourselves 😀 What cereal do you want when a cereal craving hits or you want something sweet and reminiscent of childhood?

    Calvin is my hero btw.

    While I like Count Chocula, I never cared for his friends, Boo-Berry and Franken Berry (that was today’s poor attempt at a lead in by the way. I wanted to make sure you caught it 😛 ). Even as a kid, I knew the flavors were completely fake. They were like settling for a Tootsie Roll when what you really wanted was a Hershey bar but you only had a nickel (ok, a penny back in MY childhood but I’m hedging on that here. Shhh.). As an adult, I’m no different. I want real flavors when I’m eating not something made from chemicals and red dye number 4,328. Well, other than that Twinkie, Cheeto, Grape Laffy Taffy and Lemonheads issue. Those don’t count. Really. They don’t. Quit rolling your eyes at me youngun or I’ll put you to bed without dinner!

    Going on the “I want real flavors” idea, today I made some homemade chutney. This is a canning recipe but it can be put into refrigerator or freezer containers too. It’s won’t keep forever but it will last about 2 months it kept refrigerated and longer in the freezer. Canning it however gives you the lovely sweet tart berry flavor for a year or twelve. I had some blueberries I needed to use as well as cranberries in the freezer (in case you didn’t know, you can buy a ton of them in season and they will keep for up to a year in the freezer. Just an FYI.) that I wanted to tell you.)  It is sweet and also quite tart as well as spicy and savory. It would be great with a nice salty piece of ham or a rich fatty pork chop or a piece of roast chicken. I can also see using it with ye olde block of cream cheese and crackers. Let me know what you think.

    Spicy Sweet Blueberry Cranberry Chutney

    • 2 cups sugar
    • 1 1/4 cups raspberry vinegar
    • 1 large onion, finely chopped
    • 1/4 cup finely chopped crystallized ginger
    • 1 teaspoon cinnamon
    • 1/2 teaspoon salt
    • 2 teaspoons red pepper flakes (adjust to personal taste)
    • 7 cups blueberries (about 4 containers)
    • 2 cups fresh or frozen cranberries (NOT canned sauce)
    1. In a large non stick saucepan, stir together sugar, vinegar, onion, ginger, cinnamon, red pepper and salt. Stir well to mix. Bring to a boil over medium heat, stirring frequently to dissolve sugar. Simmer uncovered for 15 minutes.
    2. Stir in the fruits. Return to boiling, stirring constantly, then reduce heat to a simmer.
    3. Stir frequently because this WILL stick to the bottom if you don’t. Simmer uncovered for about 30 minutes or until desired consistency. It will thicken up some as it cools so don’t let it get too thick while cooking. You want it thickened but still syrupy.
    4. Ladle the chutney into hot sterilized jars, leaving a 1/2 inch head space.. Make sure to wipe the rims well because anything left on the rims now can be future germ territory later. Process in a boiling water bath for ten minutes. Let cool and store in a cool dark place. It’s like Count Chocula; it likes the dark. 😛

    I know; not the worlds most exciting photography today. It's hard to really showcase a dark colored condiment. Just make it and eat it 😛

    Chocolate Is Our Friend

    Posted on by
    38

    This is creamy, silky, chocolately and as rich as a good quality piece of candy...but cold 😛

    Well, it’s my friend anyway. Maybe it hates you. I don’t really know. But if it does, can you send it over to my house? I’ll buy it dinner and roses, say sweet things to it, then nibble at it’s silky neck. Man, why does every post I write lately have sexual undertones? What is UP with that? Maybe I just need more chocolate. Yeah, that’s it; more chocolate. Silky, sweet, creamy chocolate *stops to get a towel to wipe up the drool from the keyboard*

    I’ve been told that I am a good albeit very random and tangential sort of a writer. I just can’t understand that. You mean all the careful hours of planning I put into each and every painstaking word doesn’t show? The care and love, the blood sweat and tears (and chocolate) I pour into every post I lovingly create for all of you isn’t immediately apparent? Me? Random?

    Oooo, shiny thing!!! I’ll be right back.

    I’m back. I still don’t understand that random tangential thing though. Hmmpphhh.

    My husband, while he likes chocolate as much as any male, jokes (at least he tries to play it off as a joke; I know better.) that men simply don’t have the same hormonal response to chocolate that women do. I have often wondered but have been too lazy to research whether or not there may be some basis in fact for that. I mean, we all know that chocolate is considered a mood lifter due to the phenylephylamine in it which is the same hormone your body releases during those early “omg, I just have to see him! I haven’t seen him for seventeen minutes!” times of being in love. Not that I’m tangential but has anyone but me ever thought that while it might be interesting, it would also be extremely emotionally and physically tiring to stay in that initial “I’m in love and giddy and my heart is racing” phase forever? I think there are valid physiological and psychological reasons that dies down after a while and love becomes quieter.

    Where was I? Oh yeah… chocolate and womens response to it. I can’t help but feel my husbands theory has some validity. Most women I know, when we’re having a bad day, we reach for a piece or twelve of chocolate. Men however reach for a beer and the remote (or go hide in the bathroom for half an hour under the guise of bodily functions. Ok, maybe that’s just my husband.) and would rarely if ever think of grabbing some chocolate to self sooth and relax. Oh well, future research territory here when I have another chocolate post 😛

    Try this one. I can’t express how much your mood will be lifted. Especially if you just stick your face in it and inhale. What? Think of it as dessert and a facial at the same time. This is a bittersweet chocolate mousse that has been frozen. I added a little cinnamon and cayenne pepper to it but you can omit those if you must. I’ll try to forgive you. It looked naked however so I sliced up some strawberries, added a generous amount of honey and some fresh mint leaves and added those to serve with this heavenly chocolate delight. And whipped cream. Gotta have whipped cream. It’s the LAW. this dessert is beyond awesome and perfect for a dinner party or when you just want to be nice to your family (I.E. you spent too much money at Amazon or Bath & Body Works)

    Frozen Bittersweet Chocolate Mousse

    With

    Honey Mint Strawberries & Whipped Cream

    • 7 ounces (approximately 1 1/4 cups) bittersweet chocolate, chopped
    • 2/3 cup heavy cream
    • 1/3 cup plus one tablespoon sugar
    • 1 teaspoon cinnamon
    • 1/2 teaspoon ground cayenne pepper (optional)
    • 1 large egg yolk
    • 1 cup unsalted butter, softened
    • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
    • 1 teaspoon bourbon or brandy
    • cocoa and powdered sugar for dusting
    • whipped cream
    • HONEY MINT STRAWBERRIES-
    • 1 lb fresh strawberries, capped and sliced
    • 1/2 cup honey
    • 3 tablespoons finely chopped fresh mint leaves
    1. Put the chocolate into a large bowl and set aside
    2. In a saucepan over medium heat, bring the cream, 1/3 cup sugar, cinnamon and cayenne to a gentle simmer.
    3. In a small bowl, whisk together the egg yolk and one tablespoon sugar. SLOWLY whisk in half the hot cream mixture. Return it all to the saucepan and cook over low heat, stirring constantly until the mixture thickens, about five minutes. Do NOT boil.
    4. Pour the hot mixture over the chocolate. let sit for about 2 minutes. Slowly whisk in the butter, a little bit at a time and then add the vanilla and the bourbon. Whisk until the mixture is very smooth. If you can’t get all the chocolate to melt, you can heat it in 30 second increments on half power in the microwave to melt the chocolate more. Just do this with caution so you don’t burn the mixture.
    5. Spray a 8 or 9 inch bread pan with cooking spray then line it with plastic wrap.  Scrape the mixture from the bowl into the pan. Cover with more plastic wrap and freeze for at least six hours. This can be made well ahead of time and left frozen and well wrapped.
    6. Meanwhile, make your honeyed strawberries. All that entails is mixing the ingredients together and letting it sit for about 2 hours.
    7. To serve, uncover and invert the mousse onto a serving plate. Remove the plastic wrap. Dust with cocoa powder and/or powdered sugar. Garnish with the honeyed strawberries and whipped cream.
    8. Do that face sticking thing I mentioned. Remember… facial.

    Literally melt in your mouth good

    Mmmm, Pork!!

    Posted on by
    25

    Also known as

    “Mr. Bourdain, I’m ready for my close up!”

     

    Those who have watched his show will know that is a phrase used many many times by Anthony Bourdain on his travel/food show “Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations”. I totally love that show. I am conservative enough that I admit that there are times I cringe at his language and his general attitude about life but I watch anyway. Maybe I enjoy it because he IS so different than I am; I dunno. Here is the link to his travel blog if you’d like to go look at it.

    He Likes Pork

    One thing the man makes no bones about liking is pork. Shoulder, chops, pulled, baked, fried, fat, belly, you name it, if it oinks, he will eat it and merrily drip grease everywhere in the process with no excuses. How can you NOT like someone who likes pork? I can not like someone who likes liver maybe (or at least be very frightened of them… they HAVE to be insane) but to not someone who likes pork would go against every fiber of my being. Point being…. go watch the show! They have it on netflix 😀

    Long story short, Mr. Bourdain is a hot pork lover. If it weren’t for that pesky “I’m married, he’s married, I’m fat and he’s hot, he’s wealthy and I’m broke, I’m fairly conservative and rarely cuss and he uses the f word fourteen times in each sentence, I live in the boonies, he lives…well…everywhere” thing, I just know we could be a happening sort of a couple. I mean… he likes pork! I like pork! Need I say more? P…E…R…F…E…C…T couple.

    I also like spicy foods and so does he. Again…perfect for each other. So today I made (yes finally. Hey; I couldn’t chew anything harder than doughnuts for petes sake!) pork chops for Anthony. You see that… I’m on a first name basis with him. Perfect coupleeeeeeeee. Anthony, you getting all this?  You’re gonna talk to your wife right? Mrs. Anthony, please don’t fight destiny. He likes pork.

    So go and get out some nice thick meaty pork chops (am I the only one thinking that that sounds a wee bit obscene after the rest of this post? Where’s the pork, Anthony?!) and some hot sauce (pork… hot… we both like… perfect coupleeeeee!) and make these pork chops. If you don’t like spicy, I don’t know what to say other than “I’m sorry”. I suppose you could omit the hot sauce in this, but you’ll hurt my feelings. And Anthonys (there’s that first name thing again; didya notice that? Huh huh huh?) and you don’t want to make him angry.

    Crispy Buffalo Style Pork Chops

     

    • 6 6 to 8 ounce boneless pork chops (nice thick meaty ones (giggles again) )
    • 2 cups buttermilk
    • 1/2 cup hot sauce (I use Franks Red Hot; use your favorite)
    • 2 1/2 cups all purpose flour
    • 1/3 cup cornmeal
    • 1 teaspoon baking powder
    • 1 teaspoon garlic powder
    • 1 1/2 teaspoons onion powder
    • 1/2 teaspoon cayenne pepper
    • 1 teaspoon salt
    • 1/2 teaspoon ground pepper
    • 1/2 cup to 3/4 cup vegetable oil
    1. Poke holes all over the chops on both sides with a fork. In a large bowl, mix the  buttermilk and hot sauce. Add chops to the milk and let marinate for at least 2 hours and up to 8.
    2. In another large bowl, mix the flour, cornmeal, baking powder and spices. Mix well.
    3. Preheat oven to 350 degrees and line a 13×9 inch pan with foil (for easier cleanup) and set a rack in it.
    4. Heat enough oil to 350 degrees in a large pan to where you have about 1/4 inch of oil.
    5. Shake off excess buttermilk, then dredge chops in the flour mixture, shaking off excess flour. Dip again in the buttermilk then again in the flour (You don’t HAVE to do the double dip. One dip in each works fine if you want a thinner crust.). Carefully add chops, not crowding pan (3 at a time works for a good sized skillet) and cook over medium to medium high heat (about 5 to 6 on an electric stove) five minutes on each side. Careful when you turn them. Use tongs and a flat thin spatula or you’ll end up pulling off the coating. After the chops have browned on both sides, put on the rack and cook in a 350 degree oven until the pork has an internal temp of 145, about 15 to 20 minutes. Contrary to popular belief, pork does NOT have to be a dry piece of leather to be safe.
    6. Serve with a good quality bleu cheese dressing just like you would for buffalo wings. Yes, I know I had said I was going to make a bleu cheese pan sauce with these (ok you knew it if you have my fan page liked on facebook anyway 😛 )  but if I hadn’t gotten dinner on the table, my whole family would have divorced me 😀

     

    Can You Do The Salsa?

    Posted on by
    30




    Can you… Salsa! Heh. I crack me up!!! Again, mainly because I crack up no one else and I’ll be damned if there will total silence when I make my completely inane dumb plays on words but still… I crack me up!!

    I can see you all shaking your heads wondering how that was even a play on words in the first place. Well duhhhh mannnn! Cause this is a post about home canning salsa. Geee, so obvious. *Gives you all the L on the forehead gesture and then realizes that only a 100% L person would even USE that gesture and giggles sheepishly* (on a side note, do Sheep giggle? If they do something stupid do they say that they are looking human? These are the things that my mind contemplates.)

    Moving on…as usual… many many moons ago I was like many of you. I bought all my jams, jellies, relishes, salsas and other yummy canned goods at the store. The store I say shamefully!!! Can you believe it!? It’s a dark part of my life I try not to look back on. the therapy took years.  Now however, I have seen the light!!! *Finds a soapbox, gets up on it and starts preaching* Yes brother, I have seeeeennnnnnn the light! And the light shines through canning jars!!!! Can we say Amen!? Say amen with me!

    I really need more therapy.

    As I was saying, but put more simply, over the years I have come to love home canning (as opposed to canning in say the Wal Mart parking lot). You can make so many flavors you can only find via gourmet stores or web sites (like Blueberry Lime Jam or Jalapeno Cranberry Preserves) as well as make the typical store bought flavors of different condiments and jams but do it knowing that they are fresh, there is no law allowed amounts of rat poop in it and it isn’t filled with preservatives (I guess to keep the rat poop fresh). Not to mention, that old saw about how fulfilling and dare I say empowering it is to can foods yourself is actually true. it’s a rather heady feeling to see jars of tasty foods that YOU made, not some hair netted stranger 2000 miles away.

    So today I am putting up what will be my first of many (over time) canning recipes. I am NOT however going to get into the whole teaching you how to can part of it. I will give the recipes and add in a link or two to good sites to go to to learn to can. It’s much easier than what one would think. If you can think “keep it clean and think safe” you can can. This post is for homemade Peach Salsa. I love this stuff! My daughter finally had to learn to make it because I was refusing to let her continue swiping what I made 😛 This has a bit of a bite (but you can make it less so) and a wonderful fruity flavor to it. It is great with chips, with meats, with cream cheese, with a spoon eating it straight from the jar….

    Here is a good link to learn proper canning techniques. 🙂

    http://www.uga.edu/nchfp/how/can_home.html

    Spicy Sweet Peach Salsa

    (Canning Recipe)

    • 3 lbs ripe tomatoes, peeled then chopped
    • 2 1/2 cups chopped onions
    • 2 cups chopped green pepper
    • 2 jalapenos, seeded and finely chopped (can also omit if you want extremely mild salsa or leave in the seeds if you want hot salsa)
    • 5 ripe peaches, peeled then chopped
    • 1 cup sugar
    • 1 cup vinegar (white or apple cider)
    • 1 1/2 teaspoons salt
    • 1 1/2 teaspoons pickling spices (can be found with canning supplies or in the normal spice aisle), tied up in a cheesecloth square (a coffee filter works well too)
    1. Easiest way to peel your tomatoes and peaches is this: boil a large pot of water. Add the fruits (not all at once) to the boiling water and boil for two minutes. Then dump into a bowl of ice water and let sit for a few minutes. The skins should then slip off easily.
    2. Put chopped tomatoes and peaches into a large heavy bottomed pot along with all the other ingredients.
    3. Boil slowly, stirring often, until thickened which should take about two hours. If your maters (yes, I said maters 😛 ) were really juicy it may take longer.
    4. Take out and discard the pickling spices.
    5. Ladle the salsa into half pint or pint jars, leaving 1/4 inch head space. Make sure to wipe the rims of the jars thoroughly with a CLEAN hot washrag. Put the clean lids on, making sure to just finger tighten. Don’t over tighten them.
    6. Process in a boiling water bath for ten minutes.
    7. This makes about 3 and a half pints.
    8. Let cool and then undo all your hard work by popping open a jar and getting out the tostitos 😀
    9. If you have never canned before, please please don’t be scared off thinking it is too much work, too much trouble or too frightening to do. It’s really quite easy and more than worth any work you put into it. I PROMISE you this. If you have any canning questions, please feel free to ask me in a comment here or write me at my gmail address (in my “about me” section)

    Who Says This Flavor Combo Is Just For Christmas?

    Posted on by
    37

    I think it has already become obvious that I like drinks. No no not alcoholic drinks though I have been known to imbibe at times. On a side note related to that, the women my husband works with (he is an R.N. so mainly works with women) told him recently when I was talking to him at work and said for him to tell them that I would have a beer for them (they were working late) that I “didn’t look like a drinker”.  Huh? Now I love these ladies to death so if you’re reading this, know that it tickled me to no end to hear that but…. HUH???? What does a drinker look like anyway? 😛 I feel like next time I want to have a drink (tonight) I need to get on a wife beater t-shirt, lots of eye make up and burp and cuss a lot. Wait… I know people like that. Never mind. 😀 But seriously, what does a drinker look like anyway? Obviously not middle aged and middle income with long hair that has more gray than I like to admit to and a really laid back way of dressing (translate- jeans and t shirts or nightgowns if I can get away with it). I have always gotten the “sweet” label but darn it, I can cuss and drink with the best of them!!! So long as they don’t say anything stronger than darn it and don’t drink anything too high of a proof or I’ll end up on the floor…or giggling madly because my hand looks funny. I’m really ruining my own case here aren’t I? Sigh.

    Moving on…or back…or sideways, whichever it was, I like drinks. Cold drinks, hot drinks, warm drinks, room temp drinks (am I the only one who prefers my pop room temp?). I am a very poor eater at the best of times but I am a fairly big drinker (now that sounds bad. I can see it later… “Yeah Janet said right there in her blog that she has a drinking problem! No, really, she did! She said she is a big drinker!”) and like most people, I am even more so in hot weather. I still drink my hot tea but I like to shake it up a bit. Hmmm, now that I’ve said shake, I can move onto the recipe. Wow, was that a lame segue or what!?

    I have never been much on the you can/should/must/it’s the law/only eat some things during certain times of the year idea. When I want something, other than seasonal berries that cost more than a house payment during the Winter, I want it now. I don’t want to wait six months for it to be the “right” time to eat it. Today, I wanted chocolate mint. That is typically a combo one sees the most during the holidays and I’m not sure why. Especially when you can be having it in this delicious shake. And boy, do I mean delicious. Being the poor eater that I am, I will probably not eat dinner tonight because I am too busy slurping this shake down as I type this. But I think it’s worth it 😀 Frosty mint, vanilla ice cream and sweet chocolate . Oh my. This is yummy. So get out the blender; go buy some York Peppermint Patties and vanilla ice cream (and some peppermint schnapps and creme de cacao if you want an adult version) and get to blending this one. Enjoy!

    York Peppermint Pattie Milk Shake

    • 3 snack sized York peppermint Patties (plus one more for garnish)
    • 1/2 cup cold milk
    • 2/3 cup vanilla ice cream
    • 2 tablespoons chocolate syrup
    • a few drops mint extract (optional)
    • 1/2 shot each peppermint schnapps and creme de cacao if making an adult version
    1. Put it all in the blender.
    2. Blend.
    3. Garnish with the extra peppermint pattie, whipped cream and more chocolate syrup
    4. Drink.
    5. Wasn’t that easy?

     

    Print Friendly and PDF

    Insert Loud Slurping Noises Here

    Posted on by
    20

    I almost wrote insert loud licking noises here but then it occurred to me that that may have been enough to have my site show up when people are hunting for porn. And while I’m all for increasing my readership, I don’t think I want to do it THAT way 😀 but licking noises would have worked too because this refreshing drink is so good you’ll start out slurping and end up licking… the glass, you pervs, the glass! Shame on you! 😛

    I believe I may have mentioned once or twice or five thousand times that I am a tea fanatic. I am pretty peasant in my tastes too. Give me a nice black tea, maybe some orange pekoe and I’m set. That was my way of saying that yes, I use Lipton tea bags and love them. Tea doesn’t have to cost 20 dollars for an ounce of it to be good. I’m about as far from snooty as you can get about tea. Ok, that’s not true. I won’t drink store brand teas cause I haven’t found a good one yet and I won’t drink decaf tea because it tastes weird. If you’re a coffee drinker who thinks that of decaf coffee (which strangely enough, tastes fine to me) you can understand where I’m coming from there.

    I do however love variety teas. I enjoy some herbal teas. Celestial Seasonings makes some wonderful ones. One of my favorites is the most soothing drink ever to have late at night.

     

    I love that stuff. But one of my all time favorite teas is Constant Comment tea. It is a black tea that is flavored with orange rind, cinnamon and other spices. It is SO good.

     

    So one day a few years back, I wanted something cold. It was approximately 5000 degrees outside (the people of Mercury came here for a tropical vacation) and I was dying of heatstroke. But I still wanted tea. So I took my constant comment tea and made a batch then mixed it with some instant strawberry lemonade. Voila!! (Sorry, don’t know how to make the thingie that makes that word look official) I had a new and so yummy Summertime drink. It’s tart (you can make it sweeter with more drink mix) and refreshing. It’s also good hot in Winter btw. And it couldn’t be any simpler. So give this a try. Make a batch, float some frozen Strawberries in it, get out a good book and sit down and relax while you sip this. Slurping allowed. But I wouldn’t suggest licking out the glass unless you’re alone. You’ll get some weird looks.

    Spiced Strawberry Lemonade Constant Comment tea

    • 1 quart water
    • 5 Constant Comment tea bags
    • 1 cup pre-sweetened strawberry lemonade soft drink mix (I use Smuckers Brand)
    1. In a medium bowl, microwave the tea bags and water for five minutes. Let steep at least one hour.
    2. Mix in the strawberry lemonade mix. Let cool. Add cold water and ice to make this equal a half gallon. Garnish with frozen strawberries. Drink. Slurp a lot.

    This Has Not A Darn Thing To Do With The Recipe :-P

    Posted on by
    49

    These are thick & fudgy & oh so chewy with frosting that isn't too sweet. Oh my....

     

    But it’s a funny story and I wanted to share it. Why? Because I am not in possession of working brain cells today and I couldn’t think of a story that would segue into Malted Milk Ball Brownies easily 😛 .

    I wrote this years back. Yes… it’s true 😀

    Who needs fillings? I have glue!

    Last night I was, well, rather buzzed. Ok ok I was pretty well blitzed. Well, I have some herbal supplement drops I take every day. At about 9pm, I drunkenly realized I hadn’t taken then yet. In a fit of alcohol induced responsibility to my body, I went to go take them.

    Just like most people, I can walk through my home in the dark with no problem. I know the path; I do it often. So when I went to get the drops out of my purse, I didn’t bother with a light. I grabbed my purse off the bathroom floor and got the drops out by feel. Or so I thought. I shook the bottle feeling like such a good girl that I was remembering to take them, hiccuped a few times, then experimentally shook the bottle. Then shook it again because I was SURE I had had more than that in there.

    But, being the drunken fool that I was, I just assumed I had used more than I thought so I opened the bottle and tipped it up over my mouth. Not much was coming out so I squeezed harder… then harder. Suddenly some spark ignited in a few sober cells in my brain and I turned on the light and looked at the bottle. I had just squirted a half a bottle of Nail Glue (Super Glue) in my mouth.

    “OMG… ACKKKKK… I’m gonna glue my tongue to my teeth!!!”, I screamed as I turned the water as hot as it would go after flinging the culprit glue behind me. I started gulping hot water trying to dissolve the glue before it glued my wiggly thingy in my throat to my tongue or something. Yes, I know it’s called a Uvula but wiggly thingy is more fun. I grabbed my toothbrush and practically killed myself trying to brush my Esophagus and stomach lining. Screw my glue coated teeth. I had visions of my throat sticking to itself and dying on my bathroom floor with my uvula stuck to my tongue. I had no intention of the legacy I left my kids being a headline on the 11 o clock news saying “A local woman died tonight after she drank super glue and her wiggly thingy got attached to her esophagus and she choked to death.”

    After I calmed down and realized I wasn’t going to die of glue poisoning or a glued throat, I started laughing. Only in MY life could this happen. Never again will I look for ANYTHING when I’m buzzed.

    My teeth feel funny. How do you get super glue off your teeth???

    On that note, today I made brownies for you. Not just any brownies though; these are stuffed with chocolate chips and many many chunky pieces of Whoppers Malted Milk Balls. then to add insult to high blood sugar injury, I added a thick creamy malted milk buttercream and garnished it with more Whoppers. Now unless you have the sugar tolerance of say… a five year old (I.E. could eat a full five pound bag of sugar with no problem and ask for more) cut these small. They are rich… they are sweet… they are darned awesome if I do say so myself. Enjoy! 🙂 These are loosely adapted from a Cooks Illustrated brownie recipe.

    Malted Milk Ball Brownies

    With

    A Malted Milk Butter Cream Frosting

    • 1/3 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
    • 3/4 cup chocolate flavored malted milk powder (find with the nestles quik and hot cocoa mixes and such)
    • 1/2 cup plus 2 tablespoons boiling water
    • 2 ounces unsweetened chocolate, chopped
    • 1/2 stick (1/4 cup) melted butter
    • 2/3 cup oil
    • 2 large eggs
    • 2 egg yolks
    • 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
    • 2 1/2 cups sugar
    • 1 3/4 cups all purpose flour (am I the only one who calls it “all porpoise flour? Ummm…don’t answer that)
    • 3/4 teaspoon salt
    • 1 12 ounce bag semi sweet chocolate chips (use good quality ones)
    • 2 cups malted milk balls, coarsely crushed (leave the chunks decent sized; you want to bite into the brownies and get some nice flavor from the chunks of candy :-)  )
    • FOR THE FROSTING- (we’re making this easy {but still delicious} today)
    • 1 can butter cream frosting
    • 1 8 ounce package cream cheese, softened
    • 2/3 cups malted milk powder
    • malted milk balls for garnish
    1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
    2. Line a 13×9 inch pan with foil and spray lightly with cooking spray.
    3. Whisk together the cocoa, malted milk powder and boiling water.
    4. Add the unsweetened chocolate and whisk well until the chocolate is melted.
    5. Whisk in the melted butter and oil then the eggs, egg yolks and vanilla. Whisk in the sugar. Stir in the flour and salt.
    6. Fold in the chocolate chips and crushed malted milk balls.
    7. Bake at 350 until a skewer or toothpick inserted in the middle (make sure you’re not hitting a chip) comes out mostly clean. A little bit of loose crumbs is fine but it’s not done if it comes out gooey and/or liquidy. They took 45 minutes in my oven.
    8. For the frosting, mix all the frosting ingredients together and beat well for 2 to 3 minutes to make sure the malted milk powder is dissolved. this is a fairly thin frosting so if you want it thicker, make it while the brownies are cooking or cooling and refrigerate it to firm it up.
    9. Frost brownies and garnish with more malted milk balls.

    Not the fanciest decorating job but I had a two year old who wanted to do it 😀

    Is There Such A Thing As “Basil Rehab”?

    Posted on by
    38

    Cause if there is, I think I need it. Every year I plant a handful of Basil plants and every year, I have the poor things picked down to baby leaves before we even get to July. I need Basil Twinkie Curry and Cheeto rehab. At the rate I’m going I am going to have to buy every basil plant at the store come Spring each year. The first year it was one plant. It was  a mild addiction. I used fresh basil in spaghetti sauces and in tomato sandwiches and periodically went out and just crushed a leave in my fingers and smelled it,. Then I would be caught sniffing my hands for hours afterward. Talk about awkward.  The next year I bought three. That was when I ventured out into making homemade pesto and using the Basil on anything involving tomatoes and cheese. there was also the time I was found on the back porch by my husband, late at night, with my head buried in the basil leaves and suspicious green streaks around my mouth. But we don’t talk about that. It traumatized him. This year I bought five plants. They are already nubs. I think I have been doing sleepwalking basil eating. that or my love of Caprese has also turned into a serious addiction.

    Todays recipe probably doesn’t help if I were to deny a Caprese problem.

    Everyone knows what Monkey Bread is right? Well, with my mind wrapped firmly around the idea of “pant pant drool drool… what else can I do with basil? Slurp slurp.. BASSSSIIILLLLLLLL”  the idea occurred to me that a version of Caprese would make a good Monkey bread. So I tried. I tried first stuffing rolls with a yummy Sun dried Tomato Bruschetta topping I have but that didn’t work. Too oily and the rolls wouldn’t seal. So instead I took rolls, stuffed them with a mix of sun dried tomatoes, fresh Basil and mozzarella. Then I sprinkled it with Parmesan cheese and Italian seasoning , drizzled the whole thing with garlic butter and baked it. Oh my God. Talk about cheesy basily (yes that is now a word cause I said so 😛 ) Heaven. Between the tart chewy sun dried tomatoes, the gooey cheese, that wonderful addictive Basil and the garlic butter and oh yeah the soft yeasty rolls, this was so full of flavor it should have been illegal. I’m glad it wasn’t though or I’d be in jail for eating three of them in quick succession. What!? I was hungry! My husband never feeds me. He’s mean like that. Plus, I can’t tell all of you what it tastes like If I haven’t tried it. Right? Of course right. 😀

    So give this a try. If you have a thing for Caprese or just love cheese, I think you’ll love this one. 🙂 Enjoy!

    Caprese Stuffed Rolls

    A La

    Monkey Bread Style

    • 28 frozen raw store bought yeast rolls 
    • 1 pound block mozzarella cheese, cut into 28 cubes
    • 28 to 56 fresh basil leaves (depends on the size of the leaves how many you will need)
    • 28 bite sized sun dried tomato pieces
    • 1 stick (1/2 cup) SALTED butter
    • 1 teaspoon garlic powder
    • 1/2 teaspoon red pepper flakes (optional)
    • Grated Parmesan cheese and Italian seasoning for sprinkling
    1. Thaw the rolls on a greased piece of foil or waxed paper.
    2. When rolls are thawed, preheat your oven to 350 degrees. Grease a monkey bread pan or any circular straight sided and flat bottomed baking pan.
    3. Take each roll and with your hands, flatten out into a circle. On each roll, put one to two basil leaves, a chunk of the mozzarella and a piece (or two if small) of the sun dried tomato. Press the roll around the cheese, making sure to seal well so they don’t pop open as they bake.
    4. In a microwave safe bowl, melt the salted butter, garlic powder and red pepper (if using) on high. Should take about 60 seconds. Stir well to mix
    5. Make a layer of the stuffed rolls in the greased pan. Drizzle liberally with the garlic butter.  Sprinkle with Parmesan cheese and Italian seasoning.  Make one more layer. Drizzle with the rest of the garlic butter. Sprinkle with more Parmesan and Italian seasoning. Bake at 350 until puffed and golden brown on top. Let sit in the pan for about 3 to 5 minutes then invert over a large plate. Eat until you’re going to burst. 😀

    I Yam What I Yam

    Posted on by
    23

    Once upon a time, there was a large basket of potatoes. They were your standard potatoes; nothing special and they knew it. Buried down deep in the basket was one lone potato that nobody liked. He was….different. He was a funny orange color and not white, red or brown like they were. So they teased him a lot. He got called “orange eyes” and “sweet baby” and they would never let him play in any reindeer games until Santa Claus apologized to him. Wait. Scratch that. Wrong story. They would never let him play potato games. Every time they played “count the green spots” or “hide your eyes” they ignored him.

    Why didn’t they like him though? Because he was special. He could do things that they couldn’t do. He also had a much higher vitamin k amount in him but being lovers of Cheetos and Twinkies, they didn’t care too much about that. Wait. Scratch that too. That’s me that is the Twinkie and Cheeto lover. My bad.

    Moving on. They didn’t like him because they were stuck in the same old ruts and they knew it. Mashed, fried, baked, boiled. Mashed, fried, baked, boiled. YAWNNNNNNN.

    But not Mr. Sweet Potato.  He was the only one in the basket capable of being made into the treat I am sharing with you today. Try taking a russet potato and frying it and then sprinkling it with cinnamon/sugar and dunking it in a warm bath of marshmallow brown sugar cream cheese dip. Not too appetizing huh? So one day Mr. Sweet Potato stood up and decided that he wasn’t going to take it any more. he was going to speak up. So he stood up (as well as any potato can stand up; he was kinda wobbly) and he cried out “Accept me for who I am!!! I YAM WHAT I YAM!!!”

    Ok, so none of that really happened. But it seemed like a damn good lead in to today’s recipe. Today I made fried sweet potato chips coated in cinnamon sugar and served with a creamy sweet marshmallow cream cheese dip. Who doesn’t love chips and dips right? This is just putting a new, sweet and tasty spin on the idea. My daughter in law, who says she hates sweet potatoes, can’t stop eating these so I think that means they are a roaring success 😀 Give them a try. They would be a perfect dinner side dish, a late night snack, a great dish for a BBQ or a wonderful way to get kids to eat high in nutrients sweet potatoes. They are…wait for it… to die for. ARGHHHHH!!! No they aren’t. They aren’t. They aren’t!!! Shame on me for using that phrase!!! 😛

    CINNAMON SUGAR SWEET POTATO CHIPS

    WITH

    A CREAMY BROWN SUGAR CINNAMON MARSHMALLOW DIP

    • 3 sweet potatoes, thinly sliced
    • vegetable or canola oil
    • 3/4 cup sugar
    • 2 teaspoons cinnamon
    • FOR THE DIP-
    • 1 10 ounce bag Kraft Cinnamon Bun Marshmallows (can sub regular marshmallows; just add more cinnamon)
    • 2 teaspoons cinnamon
    • 4 ounces cream cheese
    • 1/2 cup brown sugar
    • 2/3 cups heavy cream
    1. In a large pot, heat about 2 inches of vegetable oil to 350 degrees.
    2. Fry the sweet potato slices, small batches at a time, until cooked, crispy and golden brown.
    3. For the dip, combine dip ingredients in a medium microwave safe bowl.
    4. Cook for 2 minutes on high. Stir to mix then cook in 30 second increments if needed, until smooth and creamy.
    5. As each batch of potatoes finishes, let cool for about 2 to 3 minutes, then shake in a bag with the sugar cinnamon mixture until well coated.
    6. Pour dip into a serving bowl and serve with chips.
    7. These don’t hold great. They are ok cold but as any fried potatoes do, they soften up and lose their crispness so you’re better off not making them far ahead of serving time 🙂