I Think My Kids Need Yeast Interventions

Buttery Yeast Rolls

I swear… I don’t starve my boys. Or at least not daily. Only on alternating Tuesdays and in months with a Y in it.. Generally speaking though, I actually allow them to eat. You would never know it though when I make something yeast risen. I can put it in the oven and come out and find the three of them huddled around the oven, drool sizzling on the glass door as they stare at whatever is in there and ask me “is it done yet? How bout now? NOW? Awwww mannnn… NOWWWW???!”. It’s the cooking version of “are we there yet!?” Thank God 3 of my kids are grown and moved… there wouldn’t be enough room around the oven and I would probably have to call in The National Guard to prevent bloodshed.

So when I made these yeast rolls the other night, I was prepared. I put on my riot uniform and hoisted up my bulletproof shield. I put up cement barriers all around the kitchen, had 911 pressed into my phone ready to press send and had a nice bottle of something high in alcohol at hand to calm my nerves. Then I got to work.  After a few hours, a new bottle of high octane hooch, as well as a few cans of food for the guard dogs and there they were. Hot, buttery, yeasty, “omg, I am gonna fight the kids for these” Buttery Yeast Rolls.The original recipe called for rolling the dough out and cutting it into crescents and yep, they were adorable looking. But…. I was soooo not feeling that ambitious. So I made regular rolls from these instead but with the added twist of a schmear (I love that word) of butter inside the roll before cooking. The original called for smearing the rolled dough with butter and then cutting it into the crescents. I got to the smearing part and got impatient; thus the making it into regular butter filled rolls part. What can I say? I was lazy.

While I can’t say that these will overtake These Oatmeal Yeast Rolls as our family’s favorite, they were quite good. Soft and fluffy, nice yeasty scent and wonderful spread with yet more butter and some apple butter. Go dig out the yeast from the bottom of your freezer, call the national guard and feed the guard dogs. Then get to cooking. The original recipe is from http://www.howdoesshe.com/

Buttery Yeast Rolls

  • 1 1/2 cups of milk
  • 3/4 cup sugar + 1 tablespoon (for the larger amount, I only used 1/2 cup of sugar because we don’t like extremely sweet yeast rolls unless it is meant for use in something sweet)
  • 1 egg, beaten
  • 1 1/2 tablespoons salt
  • 2 tablespoons yeast
  • 2 cup warm water (about 110 to 115 degrees. No hotter or you may kill your yeast)
  • 9 to 10 cups of flour (can vary depending on tons of conditions)
  • 1 cup of butter, softened
  1. Heat 1 1/2 cups of milk, 3/4 cup sugar and 1/2 cup butter in large microwave safe bowl, for 2 minutes. Let mixture sit until it cools somewhat.
  2. While it cools, in a measuring cup, combine the yeast and sugar with the 2 cups of warm water. Let it sit for a few minutes until it is nice and bubbly. Meanwhile, add in the beaten egg  and salt to the milk mixture.
  3. Add the yeast to the milk mixture and stir well. Add in the flour, about 2 to 3 cups at a time. Don’t try using a hand mixer for this. If you have a stand mixer, it should work fine. I don’t have one, thus it was huge wooden spoon time for me.
  4. By the time you have all the flour in, it will be a big sticky blob. Feel free to use your hands to finish mixing the flour in. It’s always good to get a feel for a yeast dough anyway, especially if you don’t work with yeast often.
  5. Plop the dough out onto a lightly floured board and knead for just a minute or two to smooth it out. Then put it back into a greased bowl, making sure to grease the top of the dough lightly so it doesn’t dry out. Cover with a clean cloth, set in a warm place (the oven with the light on is a good one) and let rise until it is doubled in bulk.
  6. Punch dough down, butter a large baking pan or about 3 9 inch cake pans and preheat your oven to 350.
  7. Pinch off portions of dough (about the size of a golf ball) and flatten them out into a flat disc in your hands. Schmear each portion with a small dollop of softened butter and then reshape into a ball, effectively enclosing the butter inside. Place each one into the buttered pan as you make them. I put them right up next to each other because we like nice soft fluffy edges, but you can separate them a bit to get edges with a bit of crisp (this will also require more pans however)
  8. Let rise again until about doubled in size. This will take about 30 to 45 minutes.
  9. Bake at 350 until the rolls are nicely browned, about 15 to 20 minutes.
  10. When done, get a cold stick of butter from the fridge. Yes you read that right. More butter. Partially unwrap it, then run it allllll over the hot rolls, leaving a melting shiny buttery glaze in your path. Enjoy. Visit your cardiologist.

This makes a buttload of rolls, even made as large as I made them. It was 31 large rolls. But they still only lasted one day in my household.



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12 thoughts on “I Think My Kids Need Yeast Interventions

  1. For fresh baked rolls, you might have to peel my face off the oven door, too, and I can guarantee that Brian will be there ahead of me. Although, at 6’4″, you’ll need a lot of guard dogs to move him out of the way! Incidentally, in New York, if you ask for a schmear, you get cream cheese. 🙂

  2. Yup, Andy and I could kill over the last roll! Good thing this makes quite a bit – between the two of us, I think we could get our fill =)

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