It’s All Greek To Me


I’ve mentioned before that I have a crappy appetite.  It’s hard for me to find foods that I really like but when I do I rarely venture far from them *Cough Twinkies and Cheetos Cough* (and yes, they ARE foods. Kind of.) Like a medium rare ribeye, potato wedges and roasted brussel sprouts will always, always always be my all time favorite dinner. Nothing, not even Ben & Jerry’s Phish Food will replace it.

You may have noticed that I have not been posting as much of my normal “OMG, if I eat this my arteries will harden and fall out of my body” type of recipes. That has been a symptom of the above issue. No, I’m not pregnant before anyone guesses that lol. But there HAS been something going on. If you “like” my facebook page, you may have seen an update here and there about exercise and calories (frightening from me I know, but you can take the mental blow. I have faith in you.). Well, about 7 or so weeks ago, I began a pretty frightening undertaking. And part of that included much less of those delicious artery hardening foods. You see, I finally got fed up with my weight. And as of today, I am now 30 pounds lighter than I was about 7 weeks ago with about another 30 to go. It hasn’t been easy because I stopped making (to avoid eating them) all the baked goods I love. Thus why all of you haven’t been getting posts filled with those foods. *Sobs in abject shame* I’M SORRY!!! I’ll try to post more of them!! Seriously, I will. I am now able to have some  faith in my own abilities to stay away from the foods I need to avoid. I also have enough faith now, since I have been doing this for almost 2 months and am 30 pounds lighter, to know that when I DO make the fattening foods, that I can eat a piece and not feel like a failure. It’s hard to explain the way my mind works and the mindset I had. With me, I have always been all or nothing. If I wanted to lose weight and ate something bad for me, that’s it… I was a total failure and I gave up. Not this time though. I have my cheat days (today is one) and I eat what I want then I get back on the proverbial diet bandwagon. And please don’t tell me to not call it a diet but a “lifestyle change”. I’m not that modern lol. It’s a diet. I’m fine with that. It’s just a word used to describe the changes I’ve made.

So today, for said cheat day, I made something that can be either quite good for you or somewhat not, depending on what you do to it before eating it. I absolutely love Greek food and one of the things I get at the fair every Summer is a Gyro. But a good Gyro, made with beef and/or lamb, is hard to do right in a home setting. I don’t like the ground meat ones so there’s where that all or nothing mentality came in. I couldn’t have a huge chunk of meat turning on a spit in my kitchen and one of those cool knives they use to cut the meat, I wasn’t going the beef/lamb route. So I used chicken.

Now is this authentic? Is the Greek government going to call me and give me an award for the best Chicken Gyro ever made? Nope. But is this based on “real” Greek food and does it have a flavor that won’t disappoint? Oh. My. Yes. It does. It is tangy from lemon juice, redolent of oregano, mint, dill and covered in Tzatziki Sauce and Feta cheese. Then, to kill that “good for you” idea, I shoved them in pitas. I mean, really… Gyros with no pita? I’m pretty sure that’s against the law. But it was a honey wheat one in my defense!!! Like one extra gram of fiber and I’m sure the word “grain” was on the package somewhere! *grins*

So c’mon. Get to cooking. Your family will love you and quite possibly erect a statue in your honor. Just make sure they wash their hands first. That sauce drips everywhere.

Don’t be put off by the long ingredient list. Most of it is for either the marinade or the Tzatziki, both of which go together very quickly.

Chicken Gyros With Tzatziki

  • 3 pounds boneless skinless chicken thighs
  • Marinade-
  • 2/3 cup good quality olive oil
  • 1/3 cup fresh lemon juice
  • zest from 2 lemons
  • 5 (yes, you read that right) minced garlic cloves
  • 2 tablespoons Oregano (this is one recipe where I will recommend dried herbs, not fresh. The flavor is stronger generally speaking)
  • 1 tablespoon dried mint
  • 1 tablespoon dried dill weed
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons dried rosemary
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons dried thyme
  • 1 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes
  • 1.5 tablespoons kosher salt (or to taste. I usually end up having to sprinkle more on the cooked chicken)
  • Fresh ground pepper to taste
  • zest from one orange
  • 1/4 cup fresh orange juice
  • Tzatziki Sauce-
  • 1 1/2 cups good quality Greek yogurt
  • 3 tablespoons olive oil
  • 1 tablespoon lemon juice
  • 3 cloves minced garlic
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • 1/4 teaspoon ground pepper
  • 1/2 cup sour cream (please don’t use fat free in this; it makes it watery)
  • 2 large cucumbers, grated (food processor works well) and then excess liquid squeezed out
  • 2 teaspoons dried dill (I have used both dried and fresh in Tzatziki. In my opinion, the dried works better because the fresh leaves an unpleasant “leafy” texture)
  • To Serve-
  • Pita bread or flatbread
  • Sliced red onions
  • sliced tomato
  • feta cheese
  1. Combine all the marinade ingredients in a large non metal bowl. Stir well to combine. Add in the chicken thighs and stir well to coat. Cover the bowl with plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least 4 hours and up to overnight.
  2. Meanwhile, while chicken marinates, make your Tzatziki.
  3. Combine the yogurt and sour cream. Add in the lemon juice, garlic, dill salt and pepper. Stir. Gently fold in the grated cucumber, then the olive oil. Cover and refrigerate for at least 2 hours and up to 4. If marinating the chicken overnight, wait until about 2 to 3 hours before serving to make the sauce.
  4. Heat charcoal grill to a medium high heat. If using gas grill, I’m not an expert there but I would guess medium high there too.
  5. Remove chicken from marinade and grill over medium high heat (this could easily be done on an indoor grill pan too) until the chicken has reached an internal temp of about 155, about 4 minutes on each side.
  6. Let the chicken rest for about ten minutes, then serve in/with pita bread, onions and tomatoes and Tzatziki. Sprinkle feta on it. Eat, drip sauce. Enjoy. Write me fan mail.

This Little Piggie Went To Market


Sesame Ginger Garlic Pork Loin Chops (Ignore that toddler finger in the photo lol)

This little piggie went into my tummy.

When I was a kid, my imagination was just as active as it is now. And no, my parents never put me into much needed therapy hehe. But when I would hear that old rhyme, I always imagined piggies, dressed in cute knee length dresses, pushing a shopping cart through Jewel with little piggie kids being freely allowed to throw packs of Twinkies and ice cream into the cart. Because piggie parents are cool like that. I also always felt sorry for the little pig that stayed home. WHY did he stay home? Was he in trouble? Too busy reading Charlottes Web? Eating roast beef? As to that, do pigs eat roast beef? My mind would envision him with plate, napkin around the neck and snout buried deep into his food.

Yes. I was a strange strange child. Continue reading

Oink. Oink I say. Oink.

Spicy Sweet Southwestern Pork Chops

I have mentioned before that we love pork in our household. I’ve mentioned it more than once actually. because…well… we love pork. Or at least, I love pork and my family is forced to follow along in my cloven footprints because of it. I have posted quite a few porky recipes in here (especially when one considers that I am primarily a baking blog… pork cookies anyone? A nice baked pork and rice pudding perchance?) with one of my personal favorites being My ode to Anthony Bourdain . I’m still waiting for him to leave his wife and come find me and take us all (my husband and kids have to come too…) away to live in fatty pork sin.

Last night I was talking to my brother about my and Russ’s future plans for our land here. We hope to someday have animals, including raising a pig or two a year. The problem would arise at slaughter time. After I got the pig out of our bed where it would be ensconced watching old Porky Pig cartoons, took back the TV remote and box of Twinkies from it, I would be lost. I’d be sitting there with my knife…ax…machete…spoon (hell, I don’t know what I’d use to kill a poor innocent piggy!) bawling hysterically, asking the pig to please do me a favor and just fall on the knife…spork…spoon…ax… and make it easier. Truthfully though, when we get to the point of slaughter, we’d have to send them out to someone because unless it was a case of the poop hitting the fan world wide, and we HAD to do it, neither my husband nor I are the slaughtering types. Continue reading

You Call It Burger, I Call It Boiger

But only because I have a thing for talking in fake accents and that’s my very bad take on a Brooklyn one.

I think I mentioned before that I have a weird quirk and love talking in different accents. Luckily for me, my husband shares my quirk and hasn’t attempted to  get me into therapy yet (well, not for THAT anyway) and if he did try, he would probably do it in a Russian accent so I’m not sure the therapist would take him seriously. We are a sight to behold…or would that be behear? when we walk through the grocery store talking loudly to each other in either a Russian, Indian or Scottich accent (our favorites). We get some interesting looks. I’m still waiting for someone to ask us where we are from because I just know I wouldn’t get through the answer without cracking up. Is it possible to laugh in a Russian accent? Hmmm.  But when we do this, he is Boris and I am Natasha and we use the names out loud but so far no one has caught on to the background of the names. Did nobody else watch Rocky and Bullwinkle when they were kids? That or they are scared to approach the crazy couple perusing the peanut butter. Clean up in aisle nutso!

With those two (and an American Southern accent and an upper crust British accent) I can voice them with no help. But strangely, with other accents, I have to have visual or oral help such as reading a book that portrays a character speaking with an accent or hearing it. Yes, I am just weird enough that I have a method for speaking in fake accents. Hey! We all need a hobby right? Mine is …is…is… ok, so mine is just generally being strange but that’s a hobby too! Not everyone can knit!

Where is this all leading you ask? Well, hell if I know! You’re expecting logic and a nice path to a recipe here? You soooo must be new to my blog. :-D My blog is all about nonsense and trying to get a laugh any way I can. Wait. That doesn’t make me sound very good does it? My blog is a place for logical stories and essays, linear thought processes and recipes that are the envy of five star restaurants and yes, I’m looking into that therapy now.

Today I’m posting (please to be imagining all of theese in a a Russian accent.) a recipe I came up with for a nice spicy (yes, more spice. If you don’t like spice you may need to check out www.blandfood.com. Now I am going to have to check to see if there is a web site with that name. I’d be willing to bet there is lol) southwestern style burger. I thought about making a mayo or relish to go with this and may do that in future incarnations but this time I wanted the burger to be the centerpiece, not the toppings. So I just used the typical ones to add crunch and cheesy goodness. This is very quickly put together and very flavorful and you can vary the toppings. Salsa, pepper jack, a yummy chipotle mayo maybe.

Southwestern Chorizo Burgers

  • 1 pound ground chuck
  • 1 pound chorizo sausage (if links, just take off the casing)
  • 1/2 cup finely chopped onion
  • 2 tablespoons minced garlic
  • 1 teaspoon ground chipotle pepper
  • 3 Tablespoons Salsa of choice
  • Buns of choice (no, not buns of steel)
  1. Mix all ingredients together, handling as little possible or the burger will be tough. You can’t totally mix the meats together so don’t bother trying.
  2. Shape into four to six burgers depending on what type of pigginess you are feeding. I made five good sized burgers.
  3. Cook by preferred method I grilled them) until no longer pink in the middle. You can’t cook these medium rare (my usual donenes…mmmmm, e-coli!) or medium because of the chorizo.
  4. Top as desired (I topped mine with a fried egg because that is one current trend I can soooo get behind) and enjoy the yumminess.

Ignore the cat hair on my background please :-D