Y’all Come Back Now Ya Hear?

If you’re reading my blog, chances are you’ve watched a show or two or five hundred on The Food Network at some time or another. Chances also are that you have very strong opinions on the hosts of those TV shows. Like Rachael Ray. She drives me batty. If I hear her say EVOO one more time instead of just saying extra virgin olive oil, I am going to reach through the screen and knock her upside the head with her garbage bowl. What’s with that bowl anyway? She tries to tell us that it’s a time saver. Ummmm…. how? I mean, really, how hard is it to walk to the trash can (that she prolly has right under a counter anyway) and toss some stuff in there as opposed to making more dirty dishes? And that thing that comes between two slices of bread? It’s a sandwich dammit, a sandwich! Not a freaking “sammy”!! Ok, sorry, I’m calm now.

Then there are the Neelys. All I have to say is get a room. You’re a cute couple but get a room. K? Thanks.

I am so not even giving an opinion on Sandra Lee. Kwanzaa Cake. Look it up on Youtube. That’s enough said right there.

But the queen of Food TV will always be Paula Deen. Love her or hate her, she reigns supreme there. Personally, I have mixed emotions when it comes to her. On the one hand, I love the majority of the food she makes. I mean, she uses ample amounts of butter, sugar and cream. Is there something in that NOT to love? But on the other hand it’s like I said. Mixed emotions. She seems so sweet and country and like you’d love to sit down with her and have a cup of coffee (not like Sandra Lee where you’d need a bottle of Vodka… and then a drink for yourself too) with her and gossip. By the same token, you would want to make sure your husband was locked up in a nunnery (heh. The mental image of my husband in a habit is pretty cool. Yeah; I need to get out more.) because Lord knows that if there is a male around, Miss Paula will be hitting on him. I swear, that woman makes Tiger Woods look virginal. Plus, I have lived in the south for well over 20 years now and I have never… I mean never, heard anyone use the word Y’all as often as she does or drawl quite as deeply unless they were trying out for a remake of Gone With The Wind.

But…like I said, her food is amazing if you like fat and calories. And you know you do. Quit shaking your head no and telling yourself that yes, you really DO prefer Tofu over heavily buttered biscuits smothered in jam. No one believes you. Since we both know that you want the biscuits, I’m here to supply you with some biscuit love, southern style. These are one of Miss Deens recipes and they are quite yummy. Cornmeal biscuits with a blackberry butter. Next time however, as much as I adore Blackberry jam (it’s rather a jam addiction of mine) I want to try making an Apricot Honey butter too. Mmmmm….

CORNMEAL BISCUITS WITH BLACKBERRY BUTTER

Blackberry Butter-

  1. 6 tablespoons butter, softened
  2. 2 tablespoons blackberry jam (I may have used more…just maybe 😀 )
  3. 1 teaspoon grated lime zest (don’t omit this; it makes the flavor of this spread)

Biscuits-

  1. 1 1/3 cups all purpose flour
  2. 2/3 cup cornmeal
  3. 1 tablespoon sugar
  4. 2 1/4 teaspoons baking powder
  5. 1/4 teaspoon baking soda
  6. 1/4 teaspoon salt
  7. 8 tablespoons (one stick) butter, chilled
  8. 3/4 cup sour cream
  • Preheat the oven to 450 degrees. Lightly grease a baking sheet.
  • To make the blackberry butter, mix together the softened butter, jam and lime zest. Stir.
  • To make the biscuits,in a large bowl mix together the flour, cornmeal, sugar, salt, baking powder and baking soda.
  • With a pastry cutter or fork cut in the butter until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Mix in the sour cream until the mixture comes together into a ball. I started with a large spoon but ended up just using my hands to finish so that I could get all the flour mixture hiding in the corners of the bowl.
  • Turn the dough out onto a lightly floured surface and pat to a 3/4 inch thickness. Cut with a 3 inch biscuit cutter. Re-pat the scraps (be gentle with the re rolled scraps. They get tough if handled too much) and roll out and cut.
  • Put on the baking sheet and cook until light golden broth, about 15 to 18 minutes depending on your oven. Do NOT over bake unless you like really crispy hard edged biscuits.
  • Serve these steaming hot with the blackberry butter.

 

 

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20 thoughts on “Y’all Come Back Now Ya Hear?

    • Yeah. I think she has a market piece of anything that pertains to food. She and Guy Fieri could take over the world if they chose to.

    • Thanks Erin. And oh no, you’re not the only one. I keep waiting for them to just rip their clothes off and get down to it and turn into the Food Networks first porn show 😛

  1. Blackberries are my F for favorite and I can’t stop thinking about this butter! I MUST make it immediately! BTW… I feel ya on the whole Rachel Ray thing. I mean, seriously, get a garbage can! You know, they sell her GB’s (ugh) a Target. Who would buy a freaking BOWL exclusively for garbage?

  2. Yes, yes, yes to the biscuits and jam, they look melt in your mouth-ish! I’d like to put a muzzle on Ms. Ray sometimes, Neely’s are OK if they’re just cooking and not making out. My name is Sandra Lee and I’ve tried to cut the other one some slack, but she works my last nerve. Then there’s Paula…love most of her recipes but wish she’d take the bling off when she cooks. And for the love of all things calorie laden quit pawing at the men!

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